we rallied to road trip to Jackson on Saturday. to see mungbean and barry and bongo. and to deliver the last of the stuff you need from the get-go. i felt some emotion bubbling as i folded up the ‘ol ergo for the last time.

boy that contraption brought me heaps of joy. and freedom. and connection. and strength. it’s a huge part of how this came to be.

i spent many hours trucking up the allthehills, with Crit in the ergo and Squawk in my belly. and then Squawk in the ergo, and Crit in a backpack.

i remember saying to Shank on one such occasion as we were on the ascent of something moderately steep, with Crit on my back and Squawk still incubating, that i was about to be stronger than i’ve ever been. that this life-turn-of-unplanned-events was going to leave me incredibly effing strong. i knew that. long before there was ever thought of any race. long before i set out to “prove something” (someone said that this week – i don’t really get it)…

i let it strengthen me physically. and mentally. and spiritually. and emotionally. and on some level, socially…

and i devote some other time to allowing myself to soften too. STHIRA SUKHAM ASANAM

the bubbling emotion over the attachment to the ergo comes from my new soft-self. kidding…ish

parenting and partnering has helped me leaps and bounds to surrender, without the association of defeat. to allow an already laid-back me to enjoy all the moments a bit more intensely…or maybe i mean less intensely…

while in Jackson, i got a pair of lobster-claw gloves. and weird neoprene bootie things that go over your shoes. and we went out to a “restaurant” with the Lewis’ because that was what the homies voted to do…and no one ate anything. and then we went to the Rec Center to swim. and we were getting our groove on about 20 minutes into being there. Crit was going down the slide. Squawk was super-duper grinning. and they whistled us out of the pool cause a kid pooped. the rain took a break long enough for us to chill at the park for a couplewhiles with Mungbean and Bongo, so that was a nice treat.

Ami said she could come Monday-Tuesday. yes!

she arrived mid-morning Monday and i had a moment to square away my passport application before we all headed to town to scoop up Crit from pre-school. they dropped me off at Shank’s (where my bikes are residing), and Ami took them all back to the Moose Willow!

i rode in the snow and rain for 5 hours. the first 3.5 hours were fun. the last 1.5 hour was only 8 miles…from the end of the pavement to our house. i saw my tracks this morning when i drove to town. looks like a drunk toddler was in control of my ship. the mud was awful and i swam all overtheplace. but i made it. and i never bailed. just kept pedalling. and i was never miserable. my hands were warm and dry in my new claws, i basically had the right layers on, although i could not feel my feet. they were soaked and frozen. got a plan for next time i’m gonna try. i have a strong feeling there will be a next time in the snow and rain…

Rode along a herd of elk and watched them all cross the road in front of me. Caught a pair of moose scurrying down the road. And fresh wolf tracks. SPIN class has nothing on Horse Creek Road.

i don’t know the next time i’ll get to ride. i have no training plan. it is entirely day-to-day. i’m without Deep Woods again this weekend. the weather looks dismal and i hate to subject the kids to the Chariot for too long…when the windows opens and the opportunity knocks, i’ll be ready!….well, actually, i’ll need 5-11 minutes…i don’t transition quickly.